This is the last day of what The Husband refers to as Cougar Week. For five whole days I’m older than he is and he loves it, so he gave the week a name. It’s cute and funny-much like him. I’ve been reminded of that lately-the fact that he is cute and funny. Over the last month I’ve also been reminded of how he is so much more.
Job changes aren’t easy. When they come sooner than expected, they can shake your confidence, make you challenge your beliefs and have you questioning nearly every decision you have made and will make in the future. It’s terrifying for every one of us to be without one income but as the provider, he has the added misfortune of possible guilt. No one would be surprised if he curled up and withdrew, or even lashed out and took it out on us.
Not only has he done neither of these things, but he has thrown himself into this new life with gusto. He is not just enthusiastically career-searching, and doing freelance work, but he’s also taken on the jobs of dad and husband with gusto. Truth be told, while I still spend every second hoping and praying for a new job, I have grown quite spoiled with him home and am very aware of the crashing withdrawal that will come when he does go back to work outside of home.
He’s always been a great dad and I’ve never had too many complaints as a wife, but I have always been aware that he has an incredible work-ethic and takes great pride in a job well done. His career has been important to him since the days when “career” was a job life-gaurding the local pool. It’s part of the reason I fell for him all those years ago. I was worried when there was a pause in this most recent career. I thought at best he’d be lost and at worst he’d be angry or sad.
He has surprised me on all counts. In fact, his passion for life extends far beyond the office doors and it’s so lovely to be reminded of that. His kindness and generosity are deeply woven and more people have gotten to see that now that he’s around our house more. He is silly and cute and that translates into laughter and joy throughout our home. His kids are loving this time so much because he is theirs when they want him. I am thrilled to have more time with my best-friend.
Perhaps the best part is, he seems to be feeding off his family instead of the other way around. It used to be he worked himself to the bone to make sure we all had what we needed. This month, we’re dancing around him to make sure he feels full. I think it’s working. He seems to have more energy and the old sparkle of mischief in his eye again.
I know the time will end soon when he returns to someone else all day long, and I’m fine with that. He is a man who is very good at what he does and derives great satisfaction from doing it. I want him to keep that. I just hope this time we can maintain the spirit that has taken over this family this month. We have a bit of us against the world going on and it suits us. We’ve cocooned ourselves in as protection from an imagined future and while I hope the future doesn’t play out, I’m kind of enjoying the cocoon.
Happy Cougar Week, my love. Tomorrow we’re even again and I think this birthday will be the start of something beautiful.
P.S. Looking for more parenting guidance and tips for self-care? Check out From Chaos to Calm a guided training to help you feel better in this tough season.
