The Husband and I have been together for a long time. We each have seasons in our marriage where one is in front of the other. Whether it’s job related or school related or just life related, someone always takes the lead. Sometimes the season lasts weeks or months but other times it is just a day or so where one of us needs to be head dog.
This week, I will leave town for work. The Husband will be left to not only distribute organic vegetables to my Coop members, but also coach my baseball team and entertain my sister and two friends who are staying overnight in our home for a bike race in New York City.
I know what you’re thinking; that is one good man. You are right to think that. He is a good man. But don’t start down the road of “oh how lucky she is to have him”, because I know that’s what some of you are doing. You’re not wrong, I am lucky to have him but he is equally lucky to have me.
Yes, I am leaving this week for four days, but upon my return he will leave me for double that. I am sure while he is gone I will not only do my own house jobs (cook, clean, take care of kids) but probably some of his as well. I suspect there is a dry cleaning run or two in my future, not to mention the dreaded garbage and recycling that will be done while he sunning it up in Vegas and Miami. (Ok, so not really sunning it up so much as trapped in an office, but you get my point.) And let’s not forget 8 days of solo-parenting. That in and of itself is enough to make up for him sorting carrots or having beers with my sister and her friends. When I travel he has reinforcements in the village of people that are called in when mom travels. When he travels, I am meant to keep calm and carry on as I do when he’s at work one hour away.
But, here’s the thing, neither of us will complain (much) and both of us will be overly-grateful to the other (really).
That’s the wonder of marriage. When it works, it really does function as a well-oiled team machine. When marriage works, it really is about complementing one another and making room for eachothers’ needs.
The Husband and I have been together a long time. It seems, this month anyway, that we just keep getting better with time.
That is wonderful.
P.S. Looking for more parenting guidance and tips for self-care? Check out From Chaos to Calm a guided training to help you feel better in this tough season.