I did the dishes and cleaned up after dinner tonight with my best girl right there beside me. She was making her lunch for tomorrow (her request-awesome huh?!) and singing along to a song we used to dance around our old-old (two houses ago) kitchen to when she was an infant. I was having a grand ole time, scrubbing ziti pans and projecting ahead ten years to when we would hang out in the kitchen and she would tell me all her tales. It was a warm and fuzzy moment. Until I looked around and wondered; where are the boys?
Then it occured to me that they were both downstairs playing trucks or racecars or something that allowed them to be totally oblivious to the fact that there was actual work being done right over their heads.
I wondered then, am I teaching this sexist behavior? Dear God am I sending the message that their job is to eat the big meal then head downstairs to scratch in front of the television while the ladies clean up their mess? I hope not. But I fear so.
Obviously, this is not on purpose. The boys are actually very good “cleaners” and they are usually more helpful around the house than their sister. I don’t think that I have done any permanent damage to their ideas of gender roles, but tonight was a wake up call. I recognize with kids that life lessons are more often caught than taught. So I better watch out next time the after dinner clean up starts. Let me roll out the second cutting board for Boy Oneder to make his own PB&J. For now, The Baby can continue to play cars, but his time will come. Never fear, pseudo-feminist mom is here. Watch out King boys. Watch out.
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Brace yourself. Ten years from now the only tales of hers you will here will be from the neighbors or maybe her friends parents. If your lucky it wont be from the police or that boy fiend you realy dont like. Now twenty years from now you will here the tales. But will you accept them as true or put on the blinders and say 'of course that didnt happen' Only a mother knows which way that goes.
Aunt Julie says
Given that your boys have a love of purses and fancy shoes, along with their race cars and super heros, I think your ok with the gender roles. Another thing, where is the blog about Aunt Maryann & Aunt Julies visit??? I feel cheated.